Oh, well, daddy had to go away.
Somewhere far away, honey, hand me my watering can please.
Will we ever see him again?
No, I don’t think you will.
Why did daddy have to go far away?
Because he made mummy angry.
How did he make you angry?
Mummy found out that daddy had a new special friend.
But isn’t it good to have new friends?
Not always honey, pass me my garden shears.
How come you didn’t like daddy’s new friend?
Because daddy’s new friend wanted daddy to only play with her, and so daddy spent all his free time playing “reverse deep sea diver”, “hide the salami” and “fish taco inspector” with his new friend, and didn’t want to play “evangelical missionaries on a sleepover” with mummy anymore. So mummy got really angry at daddy and his new friend and she did something so they will be together for all eternity.
How come you’re planting flowers in the backyard now?
Well, I figured since I had to fill in this hole I dug….